The Driving Force of Anonymity

It was the perfect day to get an early afternoon buzz going. The October weather blessed the state of Florida with clear, bright skies and a cool, calming breeze. A friend and I were enjoying the salty air blowing off the bay as we sipped overpriced mimosas and nibbled on Brie and calamari. It was a gorgeous, soothing kind of day where you shouldn’t have a care in the world.

Too antagonistic to just revel in our bliss, our conversation turned (quite heatedly) to traffic; Florida drivers in particular. After a few minutes of discussing how much we despised other drivers, I began to reflect on a recent trip that had gotten under my skin. A few days prior, while running late for school, it felt like every driver on the road was against me. Everyone seemed to be cruising at 5 under the speed limit, while simultaneously boxing me in, so I couldn’t break away.

After 10 minutes of screaming at people who couldn’t hear me, I had a bit of a (non-drunken) revelation. I took a step back, and thought, ‘maybe you are the asshole.’ I was the one who was weaving through traffic and cutting people off, but with the anonymity my car provided, I felt comfortable throwing social decency and self-accountability out the window. In my own mind, I had turned the normal, safe driver into a dick.

From this thought, I expanded the idea to all the knee-jerk reactions we come to about other drivers. It seems every city/state/country believes they have the worst drivers in the world, but do all people suck at driving, or is traffic a collection of small human errors in rapid-fire form? Everyone has nearly taken a wrong turn, swerved because of a distraction, or waited too long to move after a light turned green, but everyone I drive with comes to the same conclusion: one mistake makes you an asshole driver.

The more we discussed the topic of anonymity, the more I realized it’s not just a problem with driving. So many components of our lives involve little direct interaction with other people. So, I began to wonder, as our worlds become smaller, with walls built by ourselves, society, and careers, does the patience and acceptance for human error exist in the anonymous, give-it-to-me-now world of today?

The Internet is an obvious example. Discussion boards and comment sections are filled with loud, obnoxious opinions that are rarely backed by anything but pure emotion. Even intelligent people can be intolerable. I’ve read some insightful counter arguments that were brushed off because of grammar or spelling errors. Online, there is no such thing as social decency. We hide behind our computer screens, so if we don’t like what we hear, we can resort to name-calling to prove our point.

In a face-to-face debate, there must be a level of respect if there is to be any headway in the topic, but with the Internet, people are able to say whatever comes to mind without any filter or immediate feedback. People are essentially arguing with themselves online while breaking down others for not being clear and precise the first time.

The way business is run today doesn’t help either. Many careers and jobs have been divided into niche categories that never truly communicate with each other. Yet, the amount of shit I hear different sectors talk about each other is ridiculous.

I’ve worked in the restaurant industry for seven years now, and had my fair share of this experience. Whenever I worked at a place that lacked communication between front and back of house, service became a giant blame-game. The servers hated hosts for over- or under-seating them, bussers moved too slowly for management, and the kitchen and wait staff were always at each other’s throats. Without communication, everyone in the restaurant was a fuck-up, except the individual thinking it.

Whether it was human error, or the luck of the draw, no one wanted to give each other a break. It was easier to say all the hosts sucked, as opposed to considering the flow of customers. Why take into account that the bussers were also playing food runners when there is a table that needs to be cleared? And why try to take a moment to reestablish the delicate balance of tickets and delivery time of food, when it can be everyone else’s fault?

Customers are no help either. While a good percent of people can be understanding, there is a solid customer base that has no sympathy for the circumstances surrounding them. In a packed restaurant, many can’t seem to put two and two together. In the chaos, things get overlooked and sometimes lost. No one is out to ruin the customer’s experience, but there are hiccups in the system that any normal person can make.

I chose to highlight what I know best, but when I hear friends and family complain about their own jobs, I hear the same tune. Insurance companies, retail, the tech-industry, etc., all seem to lack consideration for human error, especially when different departments never meet face-to-face.

So, again, I pose the question: is there room for human error today, or have we become a hypocritical culture that can’t except that everyone, including ourselves, makes mistakes? Are we are losing the human experience to selfish necessities and demands? It sure seems so.

“After the first glass, you see things as you wish they were. After the second, you see things as they are not. Finally, you see things as they really are, and that is the most horrible thing in the world.”

― Oscar Wilde